I grew up in a little town in southern Idaho, not knowing a whole lot about religion or really affiliating with any particular one. My understanding of God was limited and my belief in Jesus Christ was pretty non existent. As a young man I began to associate with great members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I quickly became so desirous of the feelings that I had when I was in there homes or with there family's. It brought these over-whelming feelings of peace, comfort, and most of all love. Things that I felt an absence of.......
I was invited to meet with missionaries, became a part of the church's scouting program, and made friends with so many wonderful saints who loved me. I quickly made the decision to be baptized, still having a near to nothing knowledge of God or the Savior. All I knew is what I felt and I LOVED IT. After my baptism I quickly fell away from the church and slowly stopped going on Sundays and associating with those members that had shown sooo much love. I guess you could call me agnostic.....
For the next four years I lived a pretty riotous life. Being a teenager with little parental supervision and lacking a moral compass I did what I wanted and lived a "pleasure seeking" life. Through this period of time my life became bleak, dark, and lonely. I began to hate myself and saw no point in existence. I lived off the temporary rush that came from substance but lacked the constant happiness that can only come with the Spirit.
When I was 17 I came home after a new years eve party. Then following morning sitting in my bathroom, overcome with fear, despair, and hopelessness..... I found myself trying to decide how I would exit a world that I found no hope in, with a future that seemed like no joy could ever be attained. At that very moment I had the most overwhelming feeling of peace. Comfort reached out and surrounded me as though someone was giving me a hug, and in an instance I knew without a doubt that I was loved and something more than I could see existed. That is when my belief in God truly began.
At that point I decided that it was my time to began my search for the truth. I struck out on my search knowing only two things: 1) I wanted that feeling to come again 2) There was a God and HE LOVED ME! I searched from church to church but found problems with all. They preached things I just couldn't believe, and that feeling... the feeling that had SAVED MY LIFE, was no where to be found. Finally after a few more months I settle on a non-denominational christian church in Rupert, Idaho. I still didn't like some of the doctrine they taught and I only found a faint resemblance of that "life saving feeling". I was baptized and attend consistently for several months. I had abandoned the hope of finding that feeling again, I just assumed that God sent that extra strong feeling just to save my life on that particular occasion.
So here was. A young man trying to change his life and become a better person. An "ex-Mormon" feeling so out of place in a high school surrounded by Mormons. Putting on my face everyday, no one really knowing the turmoil I faced in my high school years, just trying to survive and change. So discouraged because I saw who I was and never thinking that I could change or become anything different.
Luckily God sent angels to my path who helped me see that anyone can become anything through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. A great friend, Tyler Searle, invited me to come to a LDS worship service to listen to him give a talk. Begrudgingly I agreed to come, trying to be a better person and a better friend. The experience that would follow would change the course of my life and my eternity.
I left for that church that day upset by the fact that I had to spend any amount of time in a "Mormon" church. Arriving I quickly went inside and tried to hide before anyone talked to me. As I sat down tears began to flow and I was so confused..... that feeling, the one that saved my life, IT WAS BACK!!! For one of the first times in years I was happy and the peace was sooo overwhelming. Instantly I knew that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was Jesus Christs church and that I would NEVER leave again. I was home, my search was over, I had found the TRUTH!
If only I could see then what would become of my life and the journey that I had begun. Now I am serving a full-time mission for the church. Taking this life saving gospel and sharing it with the world. My entire life being change because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. So many people tried to share it with me along the way, and luckily they never gave up, the Lord eventually softened my heart.... And I am eternally grateful.
Lives are changed by invitations and through love and compassion.
Just like this picture depicts Christ was able to calm the storm that my life had become, and I am forever grateful....
This is only a small part of my story but if you take anything from it. Know that this story is meant to glorify the power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. To help you see that no effort is wasted. And that there is hope in the gospel of Jesus Christ. Thank you to everyone who played a part in this, I wish I could type out the whole story but this will have to do for now.
I testify of two things 1) Jesus is the Christ, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is his established kingdom on earth, and that the Atonement can change anyone into anything. 2) No invitation or missionary effort is wasted, you will change peoples lives.... just like Tyler did for mine.
I testify of two things 1) Jesus is the Christ, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is his established kingdom on earth, and that the Atonement can change anyone into anything. 2) No invitation or missionary effort is wasted, you will change peoples lives.... just like Tyler did for mine.
Stayed tuned and in my next post I will tell you how I came to the decision to serve a mission and how that changed my life!
Never give up and never stop inviting, as sons and daughters of God we have his power to change lives, I pray that some one reads this and it either inspires them to change there life or inspires them to change someone else's....
Love Elder Mark Terrill Knobbe
Love you Mark. You're a wonderful example of faith, strength and good. Thank you for having such a great impact on our family. We constantly pray for you.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for sharing your story! I can relate because of that overwhelming, peaceful feeling of God's love...it's found in this church.
ReplyDelete